“When you recover or discover something that nourishes
your soul and brings joy, care enough about yourself to make room for it in
your life.” – Jean Shinoda Bolen
So essential to life balance and our overall health,
self-care fuels our emotional, mental, physical and spiritual well-being.
Without self-care, our lives can feel harried, stressed and out of control. However,
we often put our own needs on the back burner, feeling a sense of guilt if we
carve out time for ourselves. If you are feeling low energy, stressed or that
you’re lacking balance in some areas of your life, learn how you can develop a
regular self-care practice. Learn how to
make time for you in your busy life and why self care is one of the most
important steps to better health.
Self care can be defined as giving yourself “permission”
to do what your body needs. We receive signals from our body telling us to slow
down or take a nap or take time for that yoga class, however in the crux of the
decision, we often ignore our bodies’ signals and choose to “forge ahead, ” to
keep “doing.” So, often we choose
“busyness” or productivity in lieu of taking a walk in the woods. Self care is
about taking care of the most important person in your life—you! Self care can
only be provided for you, by you.
We live in an age where productivity is the new normal. From the time we wake up, we are in a rush; we
rush to get kids ready for school, rush to our jobs or home to do housework and
errands and then it’s homework, dinner, dishes, bath and bed. For many of us,
life has become a treadmill that we can’t slow down or get off of. However, this state of always “doing” versus
“being” is not good for our health. It can make us feel worn out, stressed and
run down. This is especially true for women, who are notorious for putting others
first and themselves last, for always nurturing others, but never themselves. Often
sacrificing their own needs, many women develop a “martyr” syndrome, without
even realizing it, which can create stress, resentment and unhappiness.
Self-care is especially important not only for your
physical and mental health but also for your sense of self-esteem. If you take
care of yourself, you are conveying to others that your needs are important,
too. It reminds our loved ones; our husbands, wives, children and co-workers
that you value yourself and they need to respect that. This is not being
selfish. It is as essential as breathing. Think of the analogy of an airplane
emergency. We all know that if we are presented with an emergency on a flight
and the oxygen mask falls down, the first rule is to put on your own oxygen
mask before assisting others. Only when we first seek to help ourselves can we
effectively give the best of ourselves to others. In fact, caring for yourself
is one of the most important things you can do for yourself. It is also often
one of the easiest things to forget.
Today stress has become one of the greatest risk factors
to poor health. According to Statistics Canada, stress carries several negative
health consequences, including heart disease, stroke, high blood pressure, as
well as immune and circulatory complications. Exposure to stress can also
contribute to behaviours such as smoking, over-consumption of alcohol, and
less-healthy eating habits. Statistics Canada reports that in 2013, 23.0% (6.6
million) of Canadians aged 15 and older reported that most days were ‘quite a
bit’ or ‘extremely stressful’. Without a routine of self care, we are at risk
for disease and unhealthy behaviours, so from this perspective, self care
becomes an essential path to improving your health.
We need to be reminded how to create a practice of
self-care, how to slow down that treadmill, because it’s in our own power to do
so. As a yoga instructor, I often help to teach my participants to give
themselves permission to be present during their practice, to let go of their
“to do” lists and allow themselves this sacred time for themselves only. This
gives them a chance to center, to become more mindful, like pressing a reset
button during their day. Instead of mindlessly plodding through their day, I
ask them to set an intention of what they would like to see manifested in their
day. This is more a spiritual “to do” list, inviting more connection, more
presence, or possibly more kindness into their day.
Yoga is only one example of inviting self-care into your
life. If yoga isn’t for you, think instead about what fuels your soul; what
makes you feel refreshed, energized, or soothed. Take time to identify your own
needs and start taking steps towards meeting them. What are some activities
that nurture you? What is your definition of self care? Your definition of self-care should be letting
yourself do whatever you want to do. That may be taking time during your day to
meditate, to get a massage, to get more sleep or to eat more regular meals. Self care is about taking proper care of yourself and
treating yourself as kindly as you treat others.
Self-care
can have many manifestations. The good news is there is no right answer as to
what self-care looks like. It can take the simple form of a good night's sleep
on a regular basis, making sure to eat healthy foods, exercising regularly,
meditating, or taking time to relax and see friends. While these examples of
self-care may seem obvious, they're actually essential elements of feeling
happy, productive and fulfilled at work and at home.
Think
of your needs as encompassing three important areas of your life; your mind,
body and spirit. All three components of your life need equal nurturing. Your
physical body needs healthy food, sleep and exercise; your mind needs
permission to take a pause from a demanding work or family life and needs to be
engaged in learning; your spirit needs to be refreshed and renewed, by, say
walking in the woods or writing in your journal. When developing your own self
care routine, remember to balance out activities for all three of these areas
of your life.
Establishing a self-care routine is such an important
tool in creating healthy boundaries and developing a sense of balance, even in the face of a challenging
work or demanding family environment. Start by introducing 10-15 minutes
per day of an activity that nurtures you and once a week, commit to an hour of
self care time. Start listening to those cues to slow down or take a nap,
instead of tuning them out as you may have been accustomed to doing. Self care
only works when you listen to your body, and do what you want without
resistance. Like anything, with practice you will be better positioned to hear
the voice that is begging for some “me” time and more likely to agree that you
are very much worth it. Care enough about yourself to make room for what
nourishes you and you will invite better health, happiness and joy into your
life.
